Tuesday, March 1, 2011

deal breaker method

i'm habitually single. maybe insistently. or tragically. who knows?

i meet interesting people all the time, luckily, but there's nearly always something not quite compatible. a 'deal breaker', if you will. i'm sure you will.

i have a simple 5-step proposal:
1) list all those deal breakers - get a piece of paper and a pen. or open a new text file. it'll be quick, i promise. 
2) pick the most important three items - the rest are garbage. who are you kidding? you're being ridiculous with all those demands, pick three.
3) print your calling card - it's cheap as hell, order like 200 of those things printed with your three deal breakers (under the header DEAL BREAKERS), and name and email address and/or phone number. giving a physical card is classy. (i find email is less creepy than phone calls from unknown numbers. you can email a phone number. clearly, do whatever you want.)
4) met some potential partners - you're already doing this, probably, just keep doing your thing. hand out the card when it's contact info time.
5) they contact you (or don't) whatever, it's their loss. you would have found out they have a ferret (or smoke cigarettes, or live with their mom) eventually, you saved the both of you a lot of time and agony.
5b) go give out some more of those cards - you have a ton of them just laying around.

so, can we do this single people? i'm more than a little frustrated with dating someone for 3 months before i find out they're irreconcilably intolerant of something i can't live without. or vice versa.

2 comments:

  1. This made me laugh a little. And, well, is it sad that I find it pretty damn logical??

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  2. oh, it's not a joke post. it's my sincere wish for the future of singleness.

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